Thursday, 11 November 2010

Day 1

I finally got a call last night at about 7pm, saying they had a bed for me. There was no way I could leave there and then, so we've just trudged up the M11 this morning.

On the way up, I'm on edge.

Will the bed still be available? Will I be on a proper bowel ward or squeezed in with the geriatrics or gynae patients? Will the staff be nice?

The biggest fear of all is handing over control. Anyone with a chronic condition will have spent years working out the best regime for them. As soon as you go into hospital, you have to hand over all your medicines and routines to other people and it's horrible. On a good ward now, they will let you "self administer" your drugs, giving an element of control back, but that doesn't include controlled drugs like opiates. Those you have to ask a nurse for and then wait until she has time to find a colleague, draw up the injections and get back to me. Once I'm at this stage, all I really need is regular painkillers and anti-sickness injections. Literally the entire success or failure of my stay will depend upon the attitude towards pain and how busy the staff are.

If you could see me now, you'd laugh. I have my own tea cup, my own teabags, my own blanket and pillow, my laptop, a picture of my boys up on the side - it's a bit like a Travelodge in my bay. As long as they bring me regular tea, feed me and keep me comfy, I'll be no trouble at all......


  1. Good luck! I've been in and out of hospital quite a bit this year and I really do feel for you. Hope it all goes well.

  2. When ever I go into hospital they place me into the spinal injuries hospital in Cardiff, thats now closing so from now on I will have to travel to Stoke Manderville which is a fair old track, the last time I went they took me up by helicopter, because they thought my spine could not take the trip by ambulance I came back in an ambulance traveling at 30 MPH all the way from London.

    Good luck hope it goes well......

  3. LOL, great idea with the teabags, hospital ones always seem so weak.
    Also it's great that you take a piece of home with you, being in a hospital does feel like a transfer of power, however, never forget that you are the expert in your care.
    I hope your stay goes well.
    Keep us updated when ever you can and look forward to seeing you soon.
    Love & hugs

  4. The 'terror' of handing over control.

    My daughter is going to a new endocrinologist today, and I am so fearful that he is going to undo the prescritions that make so much difference but are not quite the NICE guidelines - eg melatonin to control her sleep reversal or high dose natural progesterone.

    This is yet another pressure on the long term sick which your blog is able to identify. For us, it is walking on eggshells, trying to guess how much the physician's ego can withstand of the patient's expertise. As you indicate the doctor/nurse is the gateway that can open or shut to better or worse symptom control.... and there are no guarantees to they're/or the system being open and rational.

    Remember Semmelweis... 150y before Lister, he made the link between medical students delivering babies after having done autopsies and the incidence of pupueral fever. By getting the staff to wash their hands before going on the delivery ward, the incidence of maternal death was dramatically slashed... but was his boss pleased? No outraged, he sacked Semmelweis and made it a hospital rule that no-one was allowed to wash their hands.

    So glad that you are at the end of the beginning ... and that having set up your own micro-environment, are still able to blog.

    Fingers crossed for good pain and anti-sickness control.

    Syzygy Sue x

  5. Syzygy Sue "how much the physician's ego can withstand of the patient's expertise."
    What a brilliant description - I might nick it for one of my posts if I may.

    That Semmelweis story says it all really - just because something is right in front of their eyes, it doesn't mean a doctor or nurse will want to see it.

  6. Just been on Polly Toybee's article thread for CIF - Smackhead cites your blog and there are already 115 'recommended's' - thought you'd like to know if you haven't picked up on it!

    Syzygy Sue

    PS 'nick' away.

  7. That's brilliant Sue!
    I've noticed you dropping the link here there and everywhere too, so a massive thank you.
    Don't stop, lol.